2 posts tagged “walking to work”
On my walk to work this week I've seen this same item that the trash guys declined to pick up:
Yes, my people, that's a treadmill for dogs. A treadmill for dogs. A treadmill for dogs. A treadmill for dogs?
Or more accurately, a treadmill for the dogs of people who are too lazy to take their dogs out for a real walk.
Revolutionary? Sure, if your idea of a revolution is having your dog chew your favorite slippers, crap on your rug, and maul you while you're sleeping. Gee...I wonder why the Jog A Dog is sitting out at the curb.
Thank you to Spucko for giving voice to the existential crisis this device would surely produce in a dog accustomed to being walked in the park: "How am I supposed to take a crap on this thing?"
1.
I was sitting at my writing desk, with Flannery on my lap. Hubzilla came in and looked at us cuddling.
Hubzilla: Are you sure you don't want to have a baby?
Me: What does that mean?
Hubzilla: You just like to cuddle with Flanny so much, maybe you'd like a baby.
I uncrossed my legs, unceremoniously evicting the cat from my lap. She landed on all four feet and strolled away.
Me: You can't do that with a baby.
2.
Hubzilla: I saw a guy on campus wearing a dress.
Me: Speaking of transgendered clothing options...
Walking home yesterday, I saw a guy wearing women's clothing. Not like a skirt or high heels, just women's clothing. Women's loafers with white ankle socks. Women's jeans. A button-front shirt cut for a woman, with a waist and boob room. A woman's cardigan sweater. I wanted to say, "Hey, sleep over at your girlfriend's house last night?"
3.
On the walk to work this morning--the pornographic doodlings of a slug. As I approached, it just looked like someone had used chalk to draw a big erect penis and testicles on the sidewalk. When I reached the drawing, however, I realized it was a trail of slug slime, with the sunrise reflecting off it.
